Gym Chronicles

For Christmas I bought my husband (and myself) a gym membership to the new LA Fitness here where I live. It’s an amazing gym, lots of machines, tons or cardio equipment, free fitness classes, a swimming pool for water aerobics and swimming laps, kids care, you name it, they have it. There’s just something about a big gym that makes you want to work hard and build up a good sweat. I’ve only been a handful of times since the new year and on my second trip it hit me….I feel very un-confident in my own body. I’ve never seen so many fit girls working out all under the same roof. It seemed that every girl in there was 25 and under and had an AMAZING body. Here I am, 32 years old with a mom bod. Yeah, I’m fit but I kinda fell off the wagon in 2016. I gained a total of 25 pounds since my wedding day 4 and a half years ago (you can see in my pictures, I'm now a little fuller than on my wedding day). I will say, I was a little too skinny at that time and obsessed with the scale. I’m in a much better place mentally these days when it comes to body image, but I still could manage to lose 10-15 pounds and tone up the soft edges.

Anyways, here I was, climbing away on the stair master evaluating everyone on the lower level wishing I had their body. I had to catch myself. I was slipping into my old ways of comparison. That’s one of the most harmful things we can do as a woman, yet we do it ALL the time! These girls might be in their early 20’s, have back muscles and tight tummies, but so what? I have a lot too. I have a ten year old son who gave me this mom bod and I’m proud of it. I have stretch marks, loose skin, not so perfect ta-ta’s, you get me, right? I had to take a step back and be appreciative of my own body. I put it through a lot. Years of bulimia, damaging my insides, starving myself, over exercising, abusing laxatives, I really wasn’t nice to my body. I am grateful now that it allows me to do the things I can do. I don’t know the long term effects of what ten years of bulimia will have on me, but I’m doing everything I can now to keep my body healthy.

It’s not about comparing ourselves to someone else who has a tighter tush than us. If you find yourself doing that, STOP! Redirect your thoughts and think of all the great things you have and are doing. Stop hating yourself because you don’t look like the model on the cover of Shape magazine. They have been air brushed, I promise! You are beautiful. You are worthy. You are created equal to every other woman out there. And of course, keep striving for your goals. You can have a tight tush, nice back muscles, and a tight tummy. Just don’t compare yourself to others who are already there. That’s my thought at least. This is my year to feel great both physically and mentally. Hopefully you make this your best year yet as well.